Even More From the Career Coach

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Even more from the career coach

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Career Coach Tip 5: Learn to Control Your Mind

Learn to control your mind for job searchPsychologists tell us that we have around 50,000 thoughts a day and far more of these thoughts are negative rather than positive.

How many times do you think to yourself, “They are all going to hate the presentation”, “They will sack me when they find out how bad at my job I really am”, “I won’t apply fort hat role as I would not have a chance”, “The interview will be awful, they will see right through me”, “I am going to be late”, “I will never be able to….” And so on. The trouble is that it is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Every time you have a negative thought it physically weakens you.

It is  interesting that if you take the letters FEAR, it could stand for, Fantasy Experiences Appearing Real?

You all know that the mind cannot tell the difference between a real event and a vividly imagined event. That’s how fiction books work, and how horror films work. And that is what advertisers try to do in convincing you to buy their product.

It is interesting that if you take the letters FEAR, it could stand for, Fantasy Experiences Appearing Real?

Try This

I want you to remember a time when a presentation, interview, assessment or another major event went wrong. Remember the following and then close your eyes and follow the instructions:

  • I want you to close your eyes and imagine being there right now. Picture yourself there. If the picture is still, make it move at the right speed. If it is black and white, make it colour. If it is distant zoom in. If you are not in the picture, put yourself in it.
  • Now hear the sounds that were around you at the time. If they are muffled, sharpen them. If the volume is low, turn it up.
  • Now feel how it feels to be there.
  • When the feeling are as high as they can be, then open your eyes.

It is likely you started to feel the feelings that you got at the time. Not good. It is your defence mechanism getting in the way. It was not a good experience, so now every time it looks like you would have to do a similar thing to then, you become nervous. It is simply a conditioned reflex made famous by Pavlov. The great thing is that you can reverse it. Now use the same experience, but try the following. Remember the instructions before doing this:

  • I want you to close your eyes and imagine being there right now and picture yourself there.
    • If you are in the picture, remove yourself.
    • If the picture is colour, make it black and white.
    • Now turn it into a black and white cartoon.
    • Now introduce some upbeat music.
    • Now see yourself watching it as if you were in an old cinema.
    • Feel how fun it is and enjoy the cartoon.
    • Now begin to turn it off so that the picture shrinks and eventually becomes a dot in the middle of the screen like an old television.
  • Now how do you feel. If you feel a little better about it, repeat this process a few times. Eventually your conditioned reflex will change and you will associate the event with fun and enjoyment.
  • When you have to undertake the event in future, just do the same thing. Also read the tip below. This stuff really works, but you have to persist.


Career Coach Tip 6: Your Mind will Take Control if you do not Control it

Try this: remember this, then close your eyes and have a go.

Close your eyes and imagine you are on the roof of the tallest building in the world and it has no railing at the edge. Notice what the roof is made of. Is it concrete? Marble? Cement?  I would now like you to walk out to the edge and put your toes over the edge. Now look down. Notice what you are feeling. Now turn round and walk or crawl back to the middle and when you get there open your eyes. How did you feel when you looked down? You see, the mind doesn’t know the difference between a real and vividly imagined event.

Ever been on a plane and noticed the white knuckles of the person next to you on take-off and touchdown? What do you think is going through their mind then? The plane crashing. My favourite is going to the doctors’ surgery and I am late, and I hit every traffic light, every bit of traffic and have pictures of the receptionist shouting at me. And when I finally get there I find the doctor is a half-hour late anyway. Who was it upsetting me all the way there? Yes, me! Because it is what we tell ourselves about the event that leads to an outcome.

Every time you have a negative thought, I want you to say in your mind, “Delete, Delete”. And like the laws of vacuum, you can’t get rid of something without replacing it. So replace the negative thought with a positive thought. So, instead of picturing the plane crashing, picture it landing safely, or picture lying on the beach two hours after landing. Instead of picturing the interview going badly, picture how much they are going to like you. After all, most fear has never happened in reality, and never will happen.

Career Coach Tip: Did you know that from a study which analysed fears in peoples minds, only 13% of fears that people have became a reality. Roughly only 1 in 7 ever happen. that means you probably stop yourself doing things 6 our of 7 times for no reason. imagine all the joy you could have had if you took the chance and controlled your mind.


Career Coach Tip 7: Leaf and Goal People

Leaf and goal peopleEver noticed that if you don’t have a goal you will be used by people who do. Going through life without a goal is like being in a ship in the ocean without a rudder. It is like getting in your car and putting your foot on the accelerator and taking your hands off the steering wheel. Would any of you do that? No, but lots of people are willing to go through their career without knowing where they are going. We call these ‘leaf people’. They are blown around by the winds of destiny never knowing where they will end up. We are not saying that it is wrong, only that you have a choice. And that choice begins here for some of you and we will help you for the rest of this day decide what you really want and help you get there.

If you have not already taken the Job Seeker Self Confidence Questionnaire, you will find the link below.

Self Confidence Questionnaire

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